How to Use Subtle Statements to Amass Great Power
An Education in Discretion
First in a series inspired by The 48 Laws of Power
“The most powerful persuasion goes beyond action into symbol”
Robert Greene, The 48 Laws of Power, Law 9: Win Through Your Actions, Never Through Argument
Imagine:
As naturally as drawing breath, all eyes magnetize to you. You sense the air shift, feeling the subtle glances from others as you move. You feel a warm glow radiating all around you. You are a hypnotist; your subtle aura of security and benevolent confidence washing over the crowd as you find your seat at the table.
The way you dress and accessorize is crucial: The key to great power is hidden in the details most overlook. The small things we may not even be able to place our finger on. If you have great ambition, a key path to influence is in the way you choose to present yourself to the world. Your clothing, your accessories, the careful way you create subtle contrasts and highlights is how you will tell others who you are. Don’t forget that we are a mere breath away from our primitive pasts as apes. We always judge a book by its cover.
The power that lies in subtlety is that you can demonstrate exactly who you are without placing anyone on the defense. By alleviating jealously you also avoid gossip, as well as being cast in a spotlight you didn’t choose. True power is graceful, patient, and above all, polite. Therefore, acts of subtlety will create an impression of awe, and not the negative emotions of inferiority or self-deprecation.
The 5 Guiding Rules for Using Subtlety to Amass Great Power:
Master the Art of Restraint
Less will always be more. No matter how fabulously you over-accessorize, it’s bound to put someone less secure in a tizzy. Avoid adding accessories for the sheer sake of having others see them, such as designer bracelets, bags and ties. Psychologically, we are drawn to those who don’t seem to have any need for outside validation. They are confident and secure about themselves; it’s something we can pick up on right away. Don’t make yourself believe that your value is wrapped in anything material. You, alone, is everything you need.
You can accomplish this in many ways: one of my favorites being a beautiful watch or piece of jewelry that stands alone. It is not the centerpiece, however it doesn’t need to compete for attention. This is a strategic way to showcase your monetary success without being obnoxious.
Be Approachable While Remaining Unmistakably Unique
Dress in a way that shows that you are a member of the collective, while not conforming to the standards of others. We are drawn to those who seem familiar but retain an air of unpredictability; this creates excitement and intrigue. Embrace more classic styles, while finding a way to style them so that they become uniquely yours. Highlight your wardrobe through unique pairings, striking layering, color combinations— even something as simple as switching out your standard laces with a different fabric can have a profound affect.
Allow for Your Personal Style to Create Intrigue
Loud statements give everything away upon first sight. Allow your presentation of self to leave something to the imagination. Find details that might be considered more obscure to enhance your aura of mystery: a hidden monogram, an unexpected color lining in your jacket, unique jewelry, an unusual way of doing your makeup. Not everyone will notice these details, but the ones who do will find you even more intriguing.
Use Symbolism
Incorporate pieces that represent something meaningful to you. These could allude to your identity, beliefs or cultural values. Humans love symbols, as we are always searching for a deeper meaning. Conveying pride in who you are, especially subtlety, will make you appear grounded and loyal to your principles. A pin with a family emblem, jewelry with a personal touch (such as a locket with a hidden photo inside), a worn, vintage bag; items like these suggest that your style stems from ideals, rather than influence or trends.
Display Self-Confidence Through Subtle Consistency
Like moths to a flame, we are pulled in by those who radiate calm, confident power. By showing up for yourself through keeping a polished aesthetic, you show others how much you respect yourself. Familiarity builds authority, while consistency reflects reliability. Take time and care to test things out, try on new styles, and see what is unique to you. This could be something as broad as a favorite color, or as small as your choice of eyewear. Whatever it is, ensure that it is deliberate. This is not a cry for attention, nor for a photo-op. This is a signifier of who you are.
While it may take time to identify how these rules can be applied to your own personal sense of style, I implore you to try. Getting dressed in the morning doesn’t need to take copious time, or be weighted down with excess of routine. These issues usually come about when we strive for perfection, which is an unreachable and stupid goal.
Focus instead on how you can quietly reflect who you are to the outside world. With an air of grace and confidence to support, you will soon find yourself the center of benevolent attention.
With great personal aesthetic,
Alexandra Diana, The A List