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Deziré's avatar

This was worth every word! I’ve been feeling this immensely, the joy and freedom of being hard to digest and misunderstood. I loved how you described that feeling so well. My favorite part was “We mirror what others expect. We contort our identities into shapes that feel familiar to them, digestible, harmless. But that kind of belonging is hollow. If you make yourself into a reflection, you will spend your whole life starving for recognition, and you will die waiting, longing, for someone to be able to see the truth of who you are.”—those words are just so powerful and packed with a deep truth. ✨

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THE A LIST's avatar

🥹 thank you so much, this means so much to me to know it resonated with you on the level it did for me. It was kind of hard to write it all out, so many deep feelings to uproot and try to understand. You made me so happy, thank you again ❤️

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Magdalena's avatar

but you see, how nice it feels when something of our own resonates with others, how at the end od the day we truly crave connection!

i really enjoyed the piece, it soothed me in me in several ways, and agree that the fundamental validation we need comes from within - however i couldn't stop thinking while reading, that i don't think i can ever feel fulfilled without others, without the chance of connection. i wish to understand those i love, and wish they want to understand me too. again, i agree one understanding of other is only limited, but just the human excercise of getting to know other seems fundamental. don't think i could be happy in isolation (material, emotional or spiritual). i think its a moral mandate and a spiritual yearning to compromise oneself with the community.

anyway, tfs your piece! enjoyed it a lot.

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THE A LIST's avatar

Oh, I completely agree. The moments where I have felt most alive is when I’m with a group of friends that I can be my true self with, even in the smallest gestures. I guess I feel as though most people don’t try to understand as much I/we would like, or as much as I/we would try to understand someone else via their perspectives, history, what validates them, love languages, etc etc. I don’t think I could be happy in isolation either, however I have also felt isolated in a crowd, and when I no longer let that hurt me, I felt free. I love your final sentence, “moral mandate” really resonates with me. Thank you for reading and for your perspectives, I really enjoyed it.

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Lauren Billings's avatar

Thank you. I needed to read this now

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THE A LIST's avatar

❤️❤️❤️

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Victoria Carlotta's avatar

What a beautiful piece I never knew I needed. Thank you.

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THE A LIST's avatar

Thank you for reading, it means the world to me. ❤️

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Ngozi Janea's avatar

Your words are incredibly potent. I've been working through my own desire to be deeply known and it's only in recent years that I'm really internalizing that the understanding I seek is something I can give to myself. And not only can I deeply understand myself, it's far more satisfying than seeking understanding from others. Thank you for articulating this sentiment so beautifully!

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THE A LIST's avatar

It’s really hard to learn I think, especially because we spend so much time self-editing. Realizing you don’t have to chisel any part of yourself down, accepting who you are…It’s one of the view things only we can teach ourselves. Tending the garden is hard work, hahaha. I’m so glad you enjoyed it, and thank you for your kind words ❤️❤️

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Ngozi Janea's avatar

Absolutely agree! I think that self editing piece is so key because when you're on a path of personal development, it can be difficult to differentiate between growing into a truer version of yourself vs trying to make yourself be something you aren't. I think we all have a unique journey with it, and yes, tending your garden is the hardest thing you'll ever do, but it's also the most rewarding... At least that's what I tell myself on the hard days, lol

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EThomps's avatar

2. “Is this not the Great Babylon that I Have Built” (c. 1904) by George William Russell

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THE A LIST's avatar

you are the best - thank you so much. Both have been updated. 🖤

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EThomps's avatar

The Google app tells me that the first image is Leda and the Swan by Koichi Iyoda.

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THE A LIST's avatar

Thank you so much

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